The Knife's Edge

I'm watching someone I'm close with be torn apart by relationship drama and in quietly watching, I'm learning something that I want to share with you all today.

In all the conversations I've had with this man, one thing is apparently clear, he's torn. He's living a life he doesn't feel is where he's supposed to be, but he won't let go of anything to move forward. He wants to stay where he is, and just bring in the stuff that's missing. I've never seen that happen for anyone, I don't think that's how it works, but it got me thinking about how we so often talk about coming to cross roads, or being on the fence, I want to give you a different analogy, one of the Knife's Edge.

There is much debate of paths, is there a "right" one? Is there a specific one that we should each be walking? What if the truth is that all god is asking of us is to simply pick one and be dedicated to it?

What if there is no right or wrong per se, but all we're being asked for in this life is dedication to a course of action, to a life, to living?

Not to get overly religious on you, but I'm reminded of the bible verse, Revelations 3:16 So, because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth.

Now as a child, and really up until this past week when I started looking deeper at this, I've always seen that as a rejection. That god would reject us if we weren't passionate about him. Now I'm realizing that
life is so much more complex than that. If there is no "heaven or hell" and we do just endlessly repeat lifetimes, and if what the arch angel Michael once told me is true - Good and evil are human labels, they don't truly exist. The light and the dark simply are, both created by the same source, the purpose is always balance between them. The war begins when the dark wants to consume the light, but the light is the only one with that power and all the light seeks is the balance.

If these things are remotely true, then it would stand to reason that whatever we have chosen for ourselves for this life, lives within our DNA. We must stop ignoring this because in doing so, we are being "lukewarm" and god won't stand for it.

However, I no longer think of the spitting out of the mouth as rejection, but more the action of a loving god who will do whatever it takes to get your damn ass off the knife's edge of lukewarmness.

Think about that knife's edge for a moment and how sharp the blade is. When we're in a state of limbo, a state of "lukewarm" or refusing to choose, for whatever reason, we end up in great pain as that knife digs in deeper and deeper, as god is crying louder and louder to simply choose.

I believe now that the act of spitting you out of his mouth is not a rejection at all, but the trigger to get you moving.

This theory of course only gets more complex when you see how we are never an island, our choices affect others and theirs affect us.

Take my twin flame and I for example. He was on the knife's edge, torn between two women he loved. Neither the other woman or myself were torn, we both wanted a life with him, but we were both pulling and pushing at him, pick me, pick me! This action caused more pain, more cutting. It shredded my twin flame until he was finally so weakened by it all that rather than choose, I believe he took the path of least resistance.

None of this is to place blame, it's simply a realization that when we insert our wants and desires on another person, it causes them pain more than it does anything else. If you know someone on that knife's edge, I believe it is our place to provide council, love, and shine a light on what we see happening, but to do that all without adding our own agenda or ideas of what we think that person should do.

In truth, we're all on the knife's edge from time to time in life. Hence why the bible warns to take the plank out of our own eye before helping another get a speck out of their eye. If we get blinded by our own wants, we do more harm than good to those around us. Being aware of your emotional and spiritual state is a lot of work, but it's very worth it. It enables you to navigate this world in such a way that matters, brings relief to others, changes conversations, changes minds and hearts without even realizing it.

When we share our hearts and our experiences, without judgement or our own agendas, that's when love arrives to make everything clear, to heal, to direct and guide. I realize we're all human with our wants and desires, but can you see how pushing those wants and desires on another, actually harms them? Can you visualize them on that knife? We may want them to come down, to choose a path and walk it with passion, but our trying to achieve that for another is never our place. We all get to choose in this life for ourselves and for those of us awake enough to realize how our actions affect those around us, I would offer this - We must focus on the highest good, unconditional love and truth above all else. We must sacrifice the wants and desires of the flesh to fully realize the mission we've been sent here to accomplish. Again, another church reference, but I hope that makes sense to you. In church we call it the "flesh" in more spiritual terms it would simply be human nature, or lower energy.

I find myself now is such a similar place with my friend as I did with my twin flame, only this time, I've stepped away. Whatever he decides is fine by me. I'm not the one being asked to choose. I recognize this as his moment, not mine. I'm not responsible for it. I can stand on the side, loving, praying, and trusting, but that's all I'm to do.

All of this has brought me to question myself as well and how committed am I to my path?

At this point, after the last five years or so, I would have to say very. I am a woman who above all else, wants to be aligned with "god" whatever that looks like. More than I want money, fame, romance, adventure, I simply want to be aligned with that which created me. And I do live my life committed to that path now.

This Knife's edge analogy got me to realize, that's the difference now in my life. Any pain I experience now, it's not that internal shredding of my own heart, it's an external force that passes. I no longer live on that knife's edge, I live committed to a path of god, spirituality and truth. I am no longer lukewarm and that has made tremendous change in my life and my experiences.

So what about you? If you were asked about your path and how committed you are to it, what would you answer? Have you ever even thought about a specific path, or just more of life as a path unto itself?

For me, I'd define my "path" today as one of teaching and healing, something I attempt to do through my relationships and through my writing. In truth, I'm teaching and healing myself, it just seems to have similar benefits for those around me.

For those of us who've experienced the twin flame, I'm not sure there are deeper wounds brought on by that, but at the same time, it brings such love and light, it forces you to say Yes, this is my path and I will walk it unto death. At least it did for me. I was already on this path, but not dedicated to it, not the way I am now. So yet another blessing I'm discovering from my twin flame experience. I am now, and forever more, dedicated to my path and I truly believe, that is what brings the magic into my life.

For more from me, from twin flame, to fiction, check out what I offer on Patreon. I'm able to share a lot more within the privacy that platform provides and am intent on building a spiritual community dedicated to this life, to purpose and destiny.  Also, join my Facebook group for more personal content for living a soul connected life. Blessings to all, today and always - Samantha